Winner
I tell ya Frank, One $6 Million distillation column disappears and they overreact! by Scott GriffinHonorable Mentions
"Jim, is it just me, or do you think there is a strange side effect to the reducing agent we accidentally ingested?" by George M. Hudak
"…and finally… Here’s where we keep the S-U-Pr-Si-Zr elements, lanthanides and actinides…" by Daniel Goodwin
"We haven’t yet got confirmation from Homeland Security, but we think this meets the intent of assuring security in CFATS." by Bruce D. Bullough
"Damn DEA. It’s only aspirin." by Joe Davis
Other Submissions
"I wonder if they realize all the other doors are unlocked." by Kaleigh Mullaly
""If this is part of LO/TO, there is another isolation device, and a bleeder valve tagged open." "Yes Bob, but the Red Tag is missing too."" by Frank B. Fox Jr.
"I do not think they understand the meaning of “Keeping our Big Data secure”" by Fred Durrenberger
"I don’t care what you say, I’m not carrying around the keys." by Kirby Hostetler
"She seems to have had a slight reaction to our new cologne." by Charles Bins
"At first I was glad the NSA was getting serious about the strategic importance of the chemical industry." by Charles Rissel
"Joe! Take a look at this, no “Safety warning sign” or “NO ENTRY” instructions, or “Danger warning”, so why the big lock out. I can’t wait to find out what’s behind this." by Ken Marx
"I was only kidding when I said we should lock them in a room and see who comes out…" by Larry Shade
"Whose bright idea is this? I think we’re going to need the fork lift to get the key in." by John Opiola
"Really????? OK, let’s face it. One of us has to go back for the key." by Joe Davis
"In the land of giants….. we just need to stay out of the way." by George M. Hudak
"… and this is the “Executive Bathroom”. Definitely management overkill; don’t cha think!?" by Rick Torchia
"You picked locks in your previous profession, didn’t you Dave?" by Joe Davis
"I don’t think this is what he had in mind when the CEO said we had to strengthen our internet security…" by Larry Shade